Marital Intimacy

“Red Hot Monogamy”        “Intimate Issues”       “Intended for Pleasure”

With book titles like this, apparently we could all use some guidance when it comes to sex and intimacy in marriage. When our confusion around intimacy is so common place, books are being written about our “issues”; when the word “monogamy” seems out of place next to “red hot”; when we need to be told that sex is a good thing, a gift we get to enjoy, as “Intended for Pleasure” purports, we may have our work cut out for us.

It’s been said that sex is what sets apart the marriage relationship from every other relationship you will ever have. You will have other friends, other intellectual and spiritual companions – but you don’t have sex with your scrapbook club or fantasy football league. That’s for your spouse.

Unfortunately, that can also make it easy to pigeon hole marriage intimacy as only being about sex. It isn’t. In marriage, intimacy is all about two becoming one, and that means on every level. Physical, intellectual, spiritual, emotional, recreational – union. Song of Songs 5:16 describes this with “…This is my beloved, And this is my friend,”.  The word is “and” because marriage is not just different, it is more.

We all desire intimacy. We all, husbands and wives, have sexual needs that were designed to be fulfilled in marriage. And those needs extend beyond the bedroom. But more than needs, we have gifts and blessings to be enjoyed, given, shared and gloried in. “Red Hot Monogamy” indeed.

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